Facing the future, they looked for people like John Wayne
But since John Wayne was no longer available, they settled for Ronald Reagan
The producer underwritten by all the billionaires necessary
Will be Casper "The Defensive" Weinberger;
No more animated choice is available
The director will be Attila the Haig, ...
Running around frantically declaring himself in control and in charge
The ultimate realization of the inmates taking over at the asylum
The screenplay will be adapted from the book called "Voodoo Economics"
By George "Polka dot" Bush
Music by the "Village People" the very military "Macho Man."
"Company!!!"
"Macho, macho man!"
"Two-three-four." "He likes to be . . . Well, you get the point."
"Huuut! Your left! Your left! Your left...right Left, right, left, right...!"
A theme song for saber-rallying and selling wars door-to-door
Remember, we're looking for the closest thing we can find to John Wayne
Cliches abound like kangaroos ...
Courtesy of some spaced out Marlin Perkins, a Reagan contemporary
Cliches like, "itchy trigger finger" and "tall in the saddle"
And "riding off or on into the sunset."
Cliches like, "Get off of my planet by sundown!"
More so than cliches like, "he died with his boots on."
Marine tough the man is
Borgart tough the man is
Cagney tough the man is
Hollywood tough the man is
Cheap steak tough
And Bonzo's substantial
The ultimate in synthetic selling:
A Madison Avenue masterpiece ...
A miracle ...
A cotton-candy politician...
Presto! Macho!
"Macho, macho man!"
Put your orders in, America
And quick as Kodak your leaders duplicate with the accent being on the dupe
Cause all of a sudden we have fallen prey to selective amnesia ...
Remembering what we want to remember and
Forgetting what we choose to forget
All of a sudden, the man who called
For a blood bath on our college campuses
Is supposed to be Dudley "God-damn" Do-Right?
"You go give them Liberals Hell Ronnie."
That was the mandate
To the new "Captain Bly" on the new ship of fools
It was doubtlessly based on his chameleon performance of the past ...
As a liberal democrat – as the head of the Studio Actor's Guild
When other celluloid saviors were cringing in terror from McCarthy
Ron stood tall
It goes all the way back from Hollywood to hillbilly
From liberal to libelous, from "Bonzo" to Birch idol ...born again
Civil rights, women's rights, gay rights...it's all wrong
Call in the cavalry to disrupt this perception of freedom gone wild
God damn it...first one wants freedom
Then the whole damn world wants freedom
Nostalgia, that's what we want ...the good ol' days...
When we gave'em Hell
When the buck stopped somewhere and you could still buy something with it
To a time when movies were in black and white ...
And so was everything else
Even if we go back to the campaign trail
Before six-gun Ron shot off his face and developed hoof-in-mouth
Before the free press went down before full-court press
And were reluctant to review the menu
Because they knew the only thing available was ... Crow
Lon Chaney, our Man of a Thousand Faces ...
No match for Ron
Doug Henning does the make-up ...
Special effects from Grecian Formula-16 and Crazy Glue
Transportation furnished by the David Rockefeller
Of Remote Control Company
Their slogan is, "Why wait for 1984? You can panic now ...and avoid the rush."
So much for the good news...
As Wall Street goes, so goes the Nation
And here's a look at the closing numbers ...
Racism's up, Human Rights are down
Peace is shaky, War items are hot
The House claims all ties
Jobs are down, money is scarce
And common sense is at an all-time low with heavy trading
Movies were looking better than ever
And now no one is looking because
We're starring in a "B" movie
And we would rather have John Wayne...
We would rather have John Wayne
You don't need to be in no hurry
You ain't never really got to worry
And you don't need to check on how you feel
Just keep repeating that none of this is real
And if you're sensing, that something's wrong
Well just remember, that it won't be too long
Before the director cuts the scene... Yea
This ain't really your life
Ain't really your life
Ain't really ain't nothing but a movie
[Refrain repeated about 25x times or more in an apocalyptic crescendo with a military cadence.]
